Annyoung ^^
hi my heaven posmen!!! what r u doing? how do u do? it's been a long time i thought tht i didn't post new story right???,but even how, i will come back here to great u like before....
oh ya, i thought i have lil bit confidence lately to involved in worker world, i know it will hard to someone like me, but i will try the best and also i just start it from the bottom now. i dunno i proud about this or not,but i should proud it right? cause i finally start to grow up as another people out thr ^^. sometime i feel like what i really interested to doing,maybe will disappear with wind one day. why i say like that,because i realized that real life i will face everyday really tough and so far to i reach. i already choose another path for my life,so i should end what i choose until i succes even i know this path also hard for me.
day by day, i try to be rasional in my path even i dunno what will happend in future right. oh ya,the funny thing i had thought before is about married life. i had thought about how if i just end my life with married someone who walling accpect me and bear what i will give to the person only,but the most important i just thought about i should married a rich person only. when my dongseng heard it,she got mad to me,and also told me if i already thought bad thing about that,i will not got it. so i back to sense and again try to face reality of my life.
my heaven posmen, do u also have stress until u doing a same thing like i do? or maybe u never thought about a married life yet?....hahahaha~~~ even i thought like that actually,i really dunno what meaning a married life, even i already heard about it at TV,internet and more...hahahahahaha~~~
oh ya, if i really got the job, i will start on November...so i hope i will try hard in the job, even it just a small job to start and also different from what i learn for a 3 years....hahahaha....FIGHTINGGGGGG!!!! Q(^_^Q)
Thursday, November 24, 2011
Thursday, September 29, 2011
what Mean behinD my dreaM?
annyoung^^
haissss~~~~ again i've dreaming abt OPPA (DBSK & JYJ) huhuhuhuhu~~~~ (TT___TT) i shouldn't happy n proud abt ths dream acctly coz it's abt my oppa right? but wht mk me sad, evrytms i dreaming abt thm, it's alwys in worse situation. last night, i dream whc i shld choose btw JYJ & DBSK(Younho & Changmin).
in tht dream, im in army whc evryone knw thm well. whn my leader knw tht i have feeling towards Yunho oppa, my leader start push me to tell a true who im really love btw JYJ & DBSk right now. *sigh* i dunno why ths situation exist in my dream n why i shld doing tht, but wht im remember im really scared in tht moment. the most worse situation, i shld say it in front of Yunho & Changmin oppa...but, it's same the group of people whc push me to make a choose more want me choose JYJ thn DBSK. cause in tht dream i dunno why my sister also thr, n she really cruel towards Yunho & Changmin oppa, whr she jst killed pet Changmin oppa have. (i dunno why the pet Changmin oppa have it's a little chicken.. (^O^) hahahahaha) my sister same like hate DBSk knw...(hahahaha (^O^)). whn evryone still push me to say a true, i couldn't say anythg n i just can say tht i really love all of thm, but i still get push from my leader to say true....whn i keep say tht i love all of thm, all group of people in thr start to hate me, tht jst treat me worse n some of thm keep whispering abt me. i jst pretend tht i dun care abt it n keep going with the group of people. whn we need take a exam, evryone jst ignore me n dun wan tell me abt wht kind of exam we take n wht tiem it start....now i knw bcoz i couldn't mk a choose evryone boycott me. until come one of my old friend n tell me evrythg, evn she same look hate me, she still try to be nice towards me. so in the end i jst follow her. whn i keep doing like tht, she non-stop mumbling to me abt why im so hard to make a decision abt who i like (still abt JYJ & DBSK) but i told her, tht i knw thm as a 5, so how can i mk a choose to pick whc one most i like now?....she jst silenct abt it. whn we doing a training like a army, evryone didn't gv a hand n keep trying avoiding me. i dunno wht a big problem will happend jst bcoz i love thm as 5. whn my training nearly end, i meet my leader bck, n my leader order me to stand in front of hundread person n agn tell abt who i choose, in the same time, i see oppa also thr. whn i start to open my mouth....i jst woke up!!!!!
arggggg!!!!! so annoying right?!!!!! why i can't done my dream abt thm? im also wondering abt why i keep dreming thm, it's same like somethg really happend to thm right now....ummmm, when i surf internet in my rest time, i really shock see a news abt JYJ.....n i told myself....*oooo~~~~ tht's why i keep dreaming abt thm, coz somthg really happnd to thm now*
ummmm....i wonder, tht really whn we keep dreaming abt someone or somthg it will happend in real life or myb tht a somethg trying to tell us???? ummmmm~~~~~~ i really confius abt it... (@ , @)
haissss~~~~ again i've dreaming abt OPPA (DBSK & JYJ) huhuhuhuhu~~~~ (TT___TT) i shouldn't happy n proud abt ths dream acctly coz it's abt my oppa right? but wht mk me sad, evrytms i dreaming abt thm, it's alwys in worse situation. last night, i dream whc i shld choose btw JYJ & DBSK(Younho & Changmin).
in tht dream, im in army whc evryone knw thm well. whn my leader knw tht i have feeling towards Yunho oppa, my leader start push me to tell a true who im really love btw JYJ & DBSk right now. *sigh* i dunno why ths situation exist in my dream n why i shld doing tht, but wht im remember im really scared in tht moment. the most worse situation, i shld say it in front of Yunho & Changmin oppa...but, it's same the group of people whc push me to make a choose more want me choose JYJ thn DBSK. cause in tht dream i dunno why my sister also thr, n she really cruel towards Yunho & Changmin oppa, whr she jst killed pet Changmin oppa have. (i dunno why the pet Changmin oppa have it's a little chicken.. (^O^) hahahahaha) my sister same like hate DBSk knw...(hahahaha (^O^)). whn evryone still push me to say a true, i couldn't say anythg n i just can say tht i really love all of thm, but i still get push from my leader to say true....whn i keep say tht i love all of thm, all group of people in thr start to hate me, tht jst treat me worse n some of thm keep whispering abt me. i jst pretend tht i dun care abt it n keep going with the group of people. whn we need take a exam, evryone jst ignore me n dun wan tell me abt wht kind of exam we take n wht tiem it start....now i knw bcoz i couldn't mk a choose evryone boycott me. until come one of my old friend n tell me evrythg, evn she same look hate me, she still try to be nice towards me. so in the end i jst follow her. whn i keep doing like tht, she non-stop mumbling to me abt why im so hard to make a decision abt who i like (still abt JYJ & DBSK) but i told her, tht i knw thm as a 5, so how can i mk a choose to pick whc one most i like now?....she jst silenct abt it. whn we doing a training like a army, evryone didn't gv a hand n keep trying avoiding me. i dunno wht a big problem will happend jst bcoz i love thm as 5. whn my training nearly end, i meet my leader bck, n my leader order me to stand in front of hundread person n agn tell abt who i choose, in the same time, i see oppa also thr. whn i start to open my mouth....i jst woke up!!!!!
arggggg!!!!! so annoying right?!!!!! why i can't done my dream abt thm? im also wondering abt why i keep dreming thm, it's same like somethg really happend to thm right now....ummmm, when i surf internet in my rest time, i really shock see a news abt JYJ.....n i told myself....*oooo~~~~ tht's why i keep dreaming abt thm, coz somthg really happnd to thm now*
ummmm....i wonder, tht really whn we keep dreaming abt someone or somthg it will happend in real life or myb tht a somethg trying to tell us???? ummmmm~~~~~~ i really confius abt it... (@ , @)
Tuesday, September 27, 2011
annyoung^^
haisss....why i still feel like not satisfied abt wht i heard from my friend bfr?....(TT__TT). when i heard wht she told me the true abt why she nvr try to contact me aftr we done school, i still feel sad abt it. it's same like thy thought im the one blame n worse for them...yup, i deny it, i really a bad person to thm call me friend on tht time, but i try hard to not let u go.....as i can....
even i called u friend n heard evryone story, i still feel i dun wan let u more burdend abt wht im really feel, do u know how much afraid im when with u. the one who told abt she could forgive me whn i non-stop talk abt how my friendshp with the person i jst meet in 3 month more meaning thn u...it's wrong, bfr we end our school, u the one alrdy leave me alone, whn i need u, u not here, but i keep trying to avoiding abt bad feeling, i knw i still hv anothr friend by myside now...do u knw,how we end? do u know i really wan talk nicely with u bfr i go? but we jst talk by phone n jst meet whn we want or somthg important to do.....i couldn't tell anyone, so i busying myself with anothr friend problem.
the one didn't tell abt she also feel worse abt me, i knw she feel the same towards me to. but, u really good to me until the end im at school, since i be close with u, i alwys feel like someone watch our frndship bhnd, evn i hold u hand, listen wht u story, i still feel burdend with the gaze. i can't tell u abt tht person alrdy spread a bad rumors bhnd me, so bhnd u i shld sttle it with tht person. i doing it bhnd u bcoz i really don wan hurting u, cz i know u alrdy hurting more frm tht person.....but i also knw if u knowing abt wht im doing u will more hurting thn tht person doing right?...but i hope u dun worry, coz wht tht person desired, i nvr try to let it get, i jst make the plan tht person want being delay.....and also i knw the weakness of tht person, she will try treat evryone to come her side with money or thg...how i can do, i love thg like tht, but i couldn't let u hurting my friend anymore even tht person say u the first person be her friend bfr me n she knw u well. i dun think tht person knw u well as i do....????. but i can't start say anythg to u all. u jst keep it, coz i knw if i try told u all the true u still can't belived it right? myb u all jst think tht's jst excussed right? or myb more....i really can't say anythg even now........
abt a 3 month friend i knw n non-stop talk abt, with thm i learn how to step forward with my friend, i wan be a open minded person with u, i learn evrythg n pratice well with 3 month friend thr. whn i bck to u, i try doing evrythg with u all,do u know, the skinship, the way we share problm, not betray anyone, crying, happy, and more expression in frindshp will make we more close?....but we didn't hv change like tht, if evrone jst go n didn't try to fix the hole inside evryone heart well....deep in my heart, i dun miss abt the person 3 month thr as mch as i miss u all forever in my life, but i miss the way frndshp we build thr...n i really hope i could do it with u all, but nothg i can do coz i jst make u put in weak situation n thought tht jst i to proud abt 3 month friend well thn u all....i alrdy heard it from someone abt tht actly.....whn i meet u all, i dunno how mch happiness whole my day, evn i couldn't me u all, jst one @ two of u, it's enough to make me smile n talk abt u with new person i meet.....
story abt our firendship, i alwys bring it evryway actly, but how can i tell ths to u????....i also don't hv any strength to argue abt frndshp btw us anymor....coz person who knw me, we also knw u all, cz i nvr stop share abt scool life, n some of thm proud abt our life u knw....thy alwsy say "waaaa, how amzg u hv tht kind of scool life with wonderful friend" heard tht i jst can smile brightly......but im little bit disspointed whn i heard evrythg frm your mouth...on tht time whn i heard u say u avoiding me coz of tht problm, i jst freeze a while n couldn't say anythg...i jst accpt it. yup, i can accpt it, but lil disspointed, coz u easily can say abt u hate the the most abt me, but i couldn't...i really couldn't do tht....coz since i meet u all, i alrdy promise to protect u all thn my family...n friend alwys first in my life!!!! evn i will hurting my family members, i couldn't do anythg abt ths feeling to, i don't want lie to myslf and hurting alone coz of ths.....
so forgive me if u see me as bad friend u know in yor life.....
to my heaven posmen---------> i still hope thy will not knw ths until now, cz i don't mind if thy'r wan say wht thy want, if tht will make thy more happy, i will fine....i will accpt it, coz i jst wan protect thm well...and dun wan thm hurting agn....how mch hard thy'r life being..evn im the last one knw evrythg too, i will still hold thm tightly in my life until i close my eyes......
yah! do u hv any close friend thn me? do u hv a nice memory at scool? or myb u nvr go to scool? kikikikikikikiki~~~~ i didn't mean to hurting u, but i also curious abt your live my dear Heaven Posmen...whrevr u r, or wht u doing rght now i hope u don't mind k^^ i also the one of your friend k, so u not alone right? coz evrytm i hv a time i will share all my story with u.....ummmmm.....friend..aufffff...now i relief aftr share it with u ^^ TQ~~~~ Q(^__^Q)
haisss....why i still feel like not satisfied abt wht i heard from my friend bfr?....(TT__TT). when i heard wht she told me the true abt why she nvr try to contact me aftr we done school, i still feel sad abt it. it's same like thy thought im the one blame n worse for them...yup, i deny it, i really a bad person to thm call me friend on tht time, but i try hard to not let u go.....as i can....
even i called u friend n heard evryone story, i still feel i dun wan let u more burdend abt wht im really feel, do u know how much afraid im when with u. the one who told abt she could forgive me whn i non-stop talk abt how my friendshp with the person i jst meet in 3 month more meaning thn u...it's wrong, bfr we end our school, u the one alrdy leave me alone, whn i need u, u not here, but i keep trying to avoiding abt bad feeling, i knw i still hv anothr friend by myside now...do u knw,how we end? do u know i really wan talk nicely with u bfr i go? but we jst talk by phone n jst meet whn we want or somthg important to do.....i couldn't tell anyone, so i busying myself with anothr friend problem.
the one didn't tell abt she also feel worse abt me, i knw she feel the same towards me to. but, u really good to me until the end im at school, since i be close with u, i alwys feel like someone watch our frndship bhnd, evn i hold u hand, listen wht u story, i still feel burdend with the gaze. i can't tell u abt tht person alrdy spread a bad rumors bhnd me, so bhnd u i shld sttle it with tht person. i doing it bhnd u bcoz i really don wan hurting u, cz i know u alrdy hurting more frm tht person.....but i also knw if u knowing abt wht im doing u will more hurting thn tht person doing right?...but i hope u dun worry, coz wht tht person desired, i nvr try to let it get, i jst make the plan tht person want being delay.....and also i knw the weakness of tht person, she will try treat evryone to come her side with money or thg...how i can do, i love thg like tht, but i couldn't let u hurting my friend anymore even tht person say u the first person be her friend bfr me n she knw u well. i dun think tht person knw u well as i do....????. but i can't start say anythg to u all. u jst keep it, coz i knw if i try told u all the true u still can't belived it right? myb u all jst think tht's jst excussed right? or myb more....i really can't say anythg even now........
abt a 3 month friend i knw n non-stop talk abt, with thm i learn how to step forward with my friend, i wan be a open minded person with u, i learn evrythg n pratice well with 3 month friend thr. whn i bck to u, i try doing evrythg with u all,do u know, the skinship, the way we share problm, not betray anyone, crying, happy, and more expression in frindshp will make we more close?....but we didn't hv change like tht, if evrone jst go n didn't try to fix the hole inside evryone heart well....deep in my heart, i dun miss abt the person 3 month thr as mch as i miss u all forever in my life, but i miss the way frndshp we build thr...n i really hope i could do it with u all, but nothg i can do coz i jst make u put in weak situation n thought tht jst i to proud abt 3 month friend well thn u all....i alrdy heard it from someone abt tht actly.....whn i meet u all, i dunno how mch happiness whole my day, evn i couldn't me u all, jst one @ two of u, it's enough to make me smile n talk abt u with new person i meet.....
story abt our firendship, i alwys bring it evryway actly, but how can i tell ths to u????....i also don't hv any strength to argue abt frndshp btw us anymor....coz person who knw me, we also knw u all, cz i nvr stop share abt scool life, n some of thm proud abt our life u knw....thy alwsy say "waaaa, how amzg u hv tht kind of scool life with wonderful friend" heard tht i jst can smile brightly......but im little bit disspointed whn i heard evrythg frm your mouth...on tht time whn i heard u say u avoiding me coz of tht problm, i jst freeze a while n couldn't say anythg...i jst accpt it. yup, i can accpt it, but lil disspointed, coz u easily can say abt u hate the the most abt me, but i couldn't...i really couldn't do tht....coz since i meet u all, i alrdy promise to protect u all thn my family...n friend alwys first in my life!!!! evn i will hurting my family members, i couldn't do anythg abt ths feeling to, i don't want lie to myslf and hurting alone coz of ths.....
so forgive me if u see me as bad friend u know in yor life.....
to my heaven posmen---------> i still hope thy will not knw ths until now, cz i don't mind if thy'r wan say wht thy want, if tht will make thy more happy, i will fine....i will accpt it, coz i jst wan protect thm well...and dun wan thm hurting agn....how mch hard thy'r life being..evn im the last one knw evrythg too, i will still hold thm tightly in my life until i close my eyes......
yah! do u hv any close friend thn me? do u hv a nice memory at scool? or myb u nvr go to scool? kikikikikikikiki~~~~ i didn't mean to hurting u, but i also curious abt your live my dear Heaven Posmen...whrevr u r, or wht u doing rght now i hope u don't mind k^^ i also the one of your friend k, so u not alone right? coz evrytm i hv a time i will share all my story with u.....ummmmm.....friend..aufffff...now i relief aftr share it with u ^^ TQ~~~~ Q(^__^Q)
my dreaM.....
ANNYOUNG (^__^)p
on 27/09/11 i jst fall sleep early thn usually, i sleep around 9pm n woke at 10am....but acctly i hope i wouldn't woke anymore n jst stay in my dream. why im say liek ths? (? , ?)...coz, i got really a nice dream. i knw, dream jst a dream and will not become real evn how i do. the dream is abt my oppa(동방신기/DBSK), i also can speak in korean well with them (^_________________^) really nice!!!!!!!, but btw them, i dunno who i am for them, i jst can talk well like we alrdy knw each othr for a long. i wonder, tht im thy manager? or staff who work with thm?...ummmmmm. the sad part i hate in the dream, DBSK is not 5 but only 2, coz 3 of thm alrdy in JYJ. in the dream, it jst start whr i n Jaejoong oppa dicuss abt somethg together (it's same like abt oppa new drama), on teh way im and Jaejoong oppa to the drama location, we accidently meet with Yunho & Changmin oppa in a casual look. whn we meet, agn i jst approach them nicely, we talk a while and Changmin oppa jst gv me a bright smile. i not clear, abt wht i talk with Yunho oppa, but it's same like abt Jeajoong oppa. i dunno why, in the dream, Jeajoong oppa nvr try to talk n approach Yunho & Changmin oppa well, he jst stand a far from thm n waiting for me done talking with Yunho & Changmin oppa. i saw a sadness in Yunho eyes when he look Jeajoong oppa like tht, but i dunno why i jst repetly say sorry to Yunho oppa to. whn it's so long i talk with Yunho oppa, Jeajoong oppa same look like mad towards me, and he jst go. see him like tht, i jst catch Jeajoong oppa back in worry mood. aftr i get Jeajoong oppa, i jst cry n say sorry repetly towards he..aigooo...i dunno why in ths dream, i alwys say 'SORRY'. Jeajoong oppa received my sorry, n we continue our work agn, whn i waiting for Jeajoong oppa done act, Yoochun oppa come to set n jst sit under tree looking at us. whn see Yoochun oppa, i jst replay it with smile....bcoz ths is jst a dream, suddenly the one bzy with act now is Yoochun oppa...(^O^) hahahahahha~~~~~~ Jeajoong oppa alrdy disappear???? aigooooo....dunno~~~~~~, when we in the car, Junsu oppa exist with tear coz bzy playing with twitter~~~~ i dunno in the end of teh dream bcome mo chaos like ths.....aftr all of the agn exist in the stage, i jst woke whn my alarm ringing~~~~ aishhhh~~~ so annoying whn ths happend tooooooooo!!!!!!!!!! OKEY~~~~ abt ths DREAM END HERE!
on 27/09/11 i jst fall sleep early thn usually, i sleep around 9pm n woke at 10am....but acctly i hope i wouldn't woke anymore n jst stay in my dream. why im say liek ths? (? , ?)...coz, i got really a nice dream. i knw, dream jst a dream and will not become real evn how i do. the dream is abt my oppa(동방신기/DBSK), i also can speak in korean well with them (^_________________^) really nice!!!!!!!, but btw them, i dunno who i am for them, i jst can talk well like we alrdy knw each othr for a long. i wonder, tht im thy manager? or staff who work with thm?...ummmmmm. the sad part i hate in the dream, DBSK is not 5 but only 2, coz 3 of thm alrdy in JYJ. in the dream, it jst start whr i n Jaejoong oppa dicuss abt somethg together (it's same like abt oppa new drama), on teh way im and Jaejoong oppa to the drama location, we accidently meet with Yunho & Changmin oppa in a casual look. whn we meet, agn i jst approach them nicely, we talk a while and Changmin oppa jst gv me a bright smile. i not clear, abt wht i talk with Yunho oppa, but it's same like abt Jeajoong oppa. i dunno why, in the dream, Jeajoong oppa nvr try to talk n approach Yunho & Changmin oppa well, he jst stand a far from thm n waiting for me done talking with Yunho & Changmin oppa. i saw a sadness in Yunho eyes when he look Jeajoong oppa like tht, but i dunno why i jst repetly say sorry to Yunho oppa to. whn it's so long i talk with Yunho oppa, Jeajoong oppa same look like mad towards me, and he jst go. see him like tht, i jst catch Jeajoong oppa back in worry mood. aftr i get Jeajoong oppa, i jst cry n say sorry repetly towards he..aigooo...i dunno why in ths dream, i alwys say 'SORRY'. Jeajoong oppa received my sorry, n we continue our work agn, whn i waiting for Jeajoong oppa done act, Yoochun oppa come to set n jst sit under tree looking at us. whn see Yoochun oppa, i jst replay it with smile....bcoz ths is jst a dream, suddenly the one bzy with act now is Yoochun oppa...(^O^) hahahahahha~~~~~~ Jeajoong oppa alrdy disappear???? aigooooo....dunno~~~~~~, when we in the car, Junsu oppa exist with tear coz bzy playing with twitter~~~~ i dunno in the end of teh dream bcome mo chaos like ths.....aftr all of the agn exist in the stage, i jst woke whn my alarm ringing~~~~ aishhhh~~~ so annoying whn ths happend tooooooooo!!!!!!!!!! OKEY~~~~ abt ths DREAM END HERE!
Friday, September 23, 2011
do u FeeL....
annyoung ^^
i back here finally, now alrdy 3:27a.m but i couldn't sleep yet...also today i didn't touch my work ^^ i just listen some song,watch some variety show n korean drama like usually.
today i realized something abt my body....do u ever feel your heart hurt alot when u remember abt someone or something??...yup, i do...but when i say like tht u'll curious abt wht right? but in the end u all jst told me tht i in love or something nonsense stuff abt love..ceh~ (,__,). i will explain when or what kind heart hurt i have, yup, i deny it tht i really stupid and clueless when ths happend (TT__TT) , but i thought ths happend since the day my separation with my housemate while i still study. maybe before i had feeling the pain like ths, but currently it's just more hurting me alot. everytime our memory start attack and play my favourite moments with them, my heart slowly like hurt....the more i let the memory control my mind, the more pain i feel. do u ever feel like someone try to stab and cut any part at your body????...um, even i not really know how much pain we have when someone do tht, but i know it's really hurt right? (X , X)....
i thought i'm really someone who couldn't go anywhr with my friend, how much i treat thm or myb thy treat me in bad way, i still can't let thy hand go...because i just back to thm (;__;) like nothing happend. aigooooo....(T ~ T)
i dunno i just rely with thm espcly to the tht one person (umm...should i say her name? or not? but her name start with S and end wit A) in jst three year, i being like tht, we start with nice coincident...and end with nice to. evryone see our relationship alwys say tht i'm just enjoy bullying her, i keep ordee her doing this and tht....auffff (;__;)but i didn't mean to do somethg like tht to her, i just someone easily forget abt somethg and it's hard for me to handle somethg well...cause i'm really a clumsy person to....but i know she also understand it right? (@ , @) (ummm....maybe). eevrytms talk abt my study life i jst end talk abt her more and say tht i'm so close with her without i noticed it....because of tht, i jst end with hurting my friend when i at school which be a friend since 8,6 or 5 year with me...it's really unfair right? (TT ^ TT) (even cry hard can't change anythg)...even ths happend to me,but i really,really,really,reallyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy LOVE MY school friends in first place at my heart!!!!! really!!!!!! (espcly the 2 fellow who alwys busy ('<';))
now i just end my friendship with my housemate with looking at thy picture, but i wil cry for miss thm alot, cause i'm cool like usually too (^__~) (does both of ths person hope me cry alot when think abt thm?? huh!!). another thing happend to me now, i alwys hope i just end got job at thy're place or myb same with thy..huhuhuhuhuhu how stupid i dreaming abt tht.... (still hope for it...) i dun wan end to forget thm, even i couldn't alwys get in touch with thm now...(bcz alwys out of credit/jst hard to go buy credit/when on9 thy not on9)..aurgggggggg (✖╭╮✖)
to the person start with S n end with A for her name, i just can say the words sorry..coz, i alwys hesitation + shy (*^^*) to make a call or talk with u, coz i never be so nice like tht to talk with u in long time right? or show my angelic side with u right? evn to say 'how do u do?,hi,do u miss me?'..aghhhhh, really not a comfortable situation to me...(ㄒoㄒ)(u know wht i mean right?)
could we meet agn one day? i hope could stay as one like before....arghhhhh~~~~ ⎝⎲⎵⎲⎠ the pain attack me now!!!!!!! arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!! huhuhuhuhuhuhuhu.....hate ths feeling......yah!!!! why ths song i heard now jst repetly non-stop!! (forget abt i click repeat button) .....*야!!! 우리 친구,왜 날 잃게 벌을?!!!!!!! 이거 노므 아퍼서....v(ಥ ̯ ಥ)v (*yah!! my friend,why punish me like this?! this very hurt..)
to my heaven posmen -----> could u tell thm ths? or just me feel ths? could u ever hv a same situation like me? could u feel hurt sometms bcoz your memory?...oh, myb i ask u alot, but i jst wan know tht u also feel like me? or u just can listen me and do nothg? (same like me...) wht kind person r u? ,ummmmm, do u have a memory actly?..........evn how i hope u alwys be my first ear to heard my story agn...it's really a long time i didn't call u right?...i back now, n agn share it with u...٩(●̮̮̃•̃)۶
i back here finally, now alrdy 3:27a.m but i couldn't sleep yet...also today i didn't touch my work ^^ i just listen some song,watch some variety show n korean drama like usually.
today i realized something abt my body....do u ever feel your heart hurt alot when u remember abt someone or something??...yup, i do...but when i say like tht u'll curious abt wht right? but in the end u all jst told me tht i in love or something nonsense stuff abt love..ceh~ (,__,). i will explain when or what kind heart hurt i have, yup, i deny it tht i really stupid and clueless when ths happend (TT__TT) , but i thought ths happend since the day my separation with my housemate while i still study. maybe before i had feeling the pain like ths, but currently it's just more hurting me alot. everytime our memory start attack and play my favourite moments with them, my heart slowly like hurt....the more i let the memory control my mind, the more pain i feel. do u ever feel like someone try to stab and cut any part at your body????...um, even i not really know how much pain we have when someone do tht, but i know it's really hurt right? (X , X)....
i thought i'm really someone who couldn't go anywhr with my friend, how much i treat thm or myb thy treat me in bad way, i still can't let thy hand go...because i just back to thm (;__;) like nothing happend. aigooooo....(T ~ T)
i dunno i just rely with thm espcly to the tht one person (umm...should i say her name? or not? but her name start with S and end wit A) in jst three year, i being like tht, we start with nice coincident...and end with nice to. evryone see our relationship alwys say tht i'm just enjoy bullying her, i keep ordee her doing this and tht....auffff (;__;)but i didn't mean to do somethg like tht to her, i just someone easily forget abt somethg and it's hard for me to handle somethg well...cause i'm really a clumsy person to....but i know she also understand it right? (@ , @) (ummm....maybe). eevrytms talk abt my study life i jst end talk abt her more and say tht i'm so close with her without i noticed it....because of tht, i jst end with hurting my friend when i at school which be a friend since 8,6 or 5 year with me...it's really unfair right? (TT ^ TT) (even cry hard can't change anythg)...even ths happend to me,but i really,really,really,reallyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy LOVE MY school friends in first place at my heart!!!!! really!!!!!! (espcly the 2 fellow who alwys busy ('<';))
now i just end my friendship with my housemate with looking at thy picture, but i wil cry for miss thm alot, cause i'm cool like usually too (^__~) (does both of ths person hope me cry alot when think abt thm?? huh!!). another thing happend to me now, i alwys hope i just end got job at thy're place or myb same with thy..huhuhuhuhuhu how stupid i dreaming abt tht.... (still hope for it...) i dun wan end to forget thm, even i couldn't alwys get in touch with thm now...(bcz alwys out of credit/jst hard to go buy credit/when on9 thy not on9)..aurgggggggg (✖╭╮✖)
to the person start with S n end with A for her name, i just can say the words sorry..coz, i alwys hesitation + shy (*^^*) to make a call or talk with u, coz i never be so nice like tht to talk with u in long time right? or show my angelic side with u right? evn to say 'how do u do?,hi,do u miss me?'..aghhhhh, really not a comfortable situation to me...(ㄒoㄒ)(u know wht i mean right?)
could we meet agn one day? i hope could stay as one like before....arghhhhh~~~~ ⎝⎲⎵⎲⎠ the pain attack me now!!!!!!! arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!! huhuhuhuhuhuhuhu.....hate ths feeling......yah!!!! why ths song i heard now jst repetly non-stop!! (forget abt i click repeat button) .....*야!!! 우리 친구,왜 날 잃게 벌을?!!!!!!! 이거 노므 아퍼서....v(ಥ ̯ ಥ)v (*yah!! my friend,why punish me like this?! this very hurt..)
to my heaven posmen -----> could u tell thm ths? or just me feel ths? could u ever hv a same situation like me? could u feel hurt sometms bcoz your memory?...oh, myb i ask u alot, but i jst wan know tht u also feel like me? or u just can listen me and do nothg? (same like me...) wht kind person r u? ,ummmmm, do u have a memory actly?..........evn how i hope u alwys be my first ear to heard my story agn...it's really a long time i didn't call u right?...i back now, n agn share it with u...٩(●̮̮̃•̃)۶
Thursday, July 28, 2011
(TT____TT)
annyong^^
hi EvryOne \(^_^)/ !!!!what r u doing right now?....ummmm????? i'm stiLL can't sleep right now, so i wRote somtHg here coZ so long tiMe i didn't post somethg here....
lately i relize abt my life changes since my age increased...i feel the pressure adult alwys talk abt. somthg tiMe i feeL liKe i can't stand abT it anymore buT i keeP telling myseLf thT i sHLd be StroNg in wHt situation i faCe now. until noW i duNNo wHt my life will be, i still jst stay at HoMe n waste my time wiTh watch TV n playing computer....but thT whT aT otHer person eye look at me, in other side, i try hard to find somethg meaning i can get n do. i know i reaLLy hard persoN to accpt somethg..coz of my behaviOr evryOne alwys mad at me.....whT i can say, my familY reaLLy can't undrstnd me weLL espcLy wht i reaLLy can do. yup i know, someoNe who can't listen wht parents told, is a worse person.........bcoz of tht, i alwys hide my sorrow. i don't undrstnd my sister also laugh with wht i really interested n keep involved in tht. wht i know in thy r eye, thy thg im someone weak, dffrnt thn them.....im totally dffrent thn them right....but i really thankful to them...coz of tht, i keep try hard to show wht i interested now nothg useless...
hi EvryOne \(^_^)/ !!!!what r u doing right now?....ummmm????? i'm stiLL can't sleep right now, so i wRote somtHg here coZ so long tiMe i didn't post somethg here....
lately i relize abt my life changes since my age increased...i feel the pressure adult alwys talk abt. somthg tiMe i feeL liKe i can't stand abT it anymore buT i keeP telling myseLf thT i sHLd be StroNg in wHt situation i faCe now. until noW i duNNo wHt my life will be, i still jst stay at HoMe n waste my time wiTh watch TV n playing computer....but thT whT aT otHer person eye look at me, in other side, i try hard to find somethg meaning i can get n do. i know i reaLLy hard persoN to accpt somethg..coz of my behaviOr evryOne alwys mad at me.....whT i can say, my familY reaLLy can't undrstnd me weLL espcLy wht i reaLLy can do. yup i know, someoNe who can't listen wht parents told, is a worse person.........bcoz of tht, i alwys hide my sorrow. i don't undrstnd my sister also laugh with wht i really interested n keep involved in tht. wht i know in thy r eye, thy thg im someone weak, dffrnt thn them.....im totally dffrent thn them right....but i really thankful to them...coz of tht, i keep try hard to show wht i interested now nothg useless...
Monday, May 9, 2011
who yor frienD?
annyoung~
do u relized who someone u call FRIEND acctually?....but for me, i belived on them who the person i call FRIEND in my life, i also belived they will not betray me anymor, evn i alredy feel when our best friend betray use. wen the person i belived do tht, i almost gv up on my way to be someone be loyal with friend n be nice to the person name FRIEND. evrydy my tears fall like a heavy raining day, evn i try to stop the tear, the tear never listen to our command, and our heart also feel like stabbed by knife. when im in ths situation, i finally found someone really can mak eme relief, evn fro a first time i still feel worry and scared to start a new friendship but i knw i shld face it's one day...the person absolutely different from the way i stand, but smile,laugh and tears the person hv n i share, suddenly change my way to gv a space...n i try to hold it as i can, but agn, the happiness we hv not same like can stay longer..i start learn hv to appreciate someone call FRIEND which i choose to not let the person hurt more evn hv alot rumors comes, i still support the person from behind...bcoz of ths, i still can be with the person until now.
our life same like circle n also not as easy as we tought, day by day we will face a new life waiting for use...in second stage, our life be more challeging. on ths time, i also worry to face it, coz im jst let myslf stay in one place n nvr wan to upgrade it. but the situation n experience i face, show me n teach me. i can't stand if i jst alone in the world, it's hard for me to accptd new person as my friend, mny thg i worry abt if i wan find new person in my life. frst i will worry abt 'can someone accptd me in ths way?' 'i thy look at me n think abt me?', all the question keep playing in my mind. and the end, someone who i hate the most n alwys feel like the oerson so annoying, be my friend. bcoz i didn't wan upgrade myslf as well as i can, i alwys hv alot negative thinking abt someone, n wht i can do jst treat them in the way who i am. be rude,shouting n also jst following my heart n not thinking abt another feeling mk me more strong. the most thng i start to hate on ths time, is a tears..i dunno how mch i hate tears. wen someone cry, i start feel mad n gv mny excuss to avoid thm. the sad story thy hv, also mk me don't stop irrated. all the negative thg start control myslf...it's same like i didn't belived in othr person. wen someone come to me, i dunno how mch strong the person to face myslf like tht, try to undstnd me,talk in polite to me n also helping me alot. to cover my true feeling i pretend like don't care wht thy do, i dunno wht in thy eye look at me. since the person start know me well, i agn start worry,worry abt thy will be knw abt my past n my real self. agn i be hard in my way....coz the person like tht, i end the end gv up on myslf, n slowly start to accpt the person n mk a promise. until now i will be like u knw me, but i dun wan revealed my way,heart,mind n soul to othr person like tht..
do u relized who someone u call FRIEND acctually?....but for me, i belived on them who the person i call FRIEND in my life, i also belived they will not betray me anymor, evn i alredy feel when our best friend betray use. wen the person i belived do tht, i almost gv up on my way to be someone be loyal with friend n be nice to the person name FRIEND. evrydy my tears fall like a heavy raining day, evn i try to stop the tear, the tear never listen to our command, and our heart also feel like stabbed by knife. when im in ths situation, i finally found someone really can mak eme relief, evn fro a first time i still feel worry and scared to start a new friendship but i knw i shld face it's one day...the person absolutely different from the way i stand, but smile,laugh and tears the person hv n i share, suddenly change my way to gv a space...n i try to hold it as i can, but agn, the happiness we hv not same like can stay longer..i start learn hv to appreciate someone call FRIEND which i choose to not let the person hurt more evn hv alot rumors comes, i still support the person from behind...bcoz of ths, i still can be with the person until now.
our life same like circle n also not as easy as we tought, day by day we will face a new life waiting for use...in second stage, our life be more challeging. on ths time, i also worry to face it, coz im jst let myslf stay in one place n nvr wan to upgrade it. but the situation n experience i face, show me n teach me. i can't stand if i jst alone in the world, it's hard for me to accptd new person as my friend, mny thg i worry abt if i wan find new person in my life. frst i will worry abt 'can someone accptd me in ths way?' 'i thy look at me n think abt me?', all the question keep playing in my mind. and the end, someone who i hate the most n alwys feel like the oerson so annoying, be my friend. bcoz i didn't wan upgrade myslf as well as i can, i alwys hv alot negative thinking abt someone, n wht i can do jst treat them in the way who i am. be rude,shouting n also jst following my heart n not thinking abt another feeling mk me more strong. the most thng i start to hate on ths time, is a tears..i dunno how mch i hate tears. wen someone cry, i start feel mad n gv mny excuss to avoid thm. the sad story thy hv, also mk me don't stop irrated. all the negative thg start control myslf...it's same like i didn't belived in othr person. wen someone come to me, i dunno how mch strong the person to face myslf like tht, try to undstnd me,talk in polite to me n also helping me alot. to cover my true feeling i pretend like don't care wht thy do, i dunno wht in thy eye look at me. since the person start know me well, i agn start worry,worry abt thy will be knw abt my past n my real self. agn i be hard in my way....coz the person like tht, i end the end gv up on myslf, n slowly start to accpt the person n mk a promise. until now i will be like u knw me, but i dun wan revealed my way,heart,mind n soul to othr person like tht..
Friday, May 6, 2011
NicE if u understand~ ^^
annyong~~again i back to my blog, i miss it alot~~~~ kya~~~~
i dunno y i still not prepared to join worker world, haiss, evn half of my frnd whc alrdy done a study with me going do some job before them going to continue study. i hope i can doing something meaning to me since im done from study, but im still like a child, stuck in my world, n also doing wht i wan. the most sadder is, wht i do alwys same like a ridiculous in other person eye..hais...i dunno why im like tht, tht im really a weirdo..aigoo~
oh ya, lately, i jst try my lucky to sent all my writing story...and i got so mny respond, some of them gv a good comment and some of them not, for all the comment them gv somethg a good thng in mylife, evn im not a good writer but i try my best to do it, cz i really interested in writing, i share the story i create...
really a nice thng wen someone gv a respond to the wht 100% made by u right? nice!!!! i will keep going improve my skills n wht the responder told me, i will take it as my guide to do somethg more better!!!TQ!!!TQ!!!!TQ!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Sunday, March 27, 2011
whY i can'T conTroL it!!!
annyoung~~~ 
today is Sunday...and i just sit infront my lappy now, nothing to do....haisssss~~~ i hope i can quickly finish my car lesson and get my lisence!!!!! after that, i hope i can get a job to!!! i think now, i have a lil bit confident to join into working world...even before i still don't have any confident to involved in this world...but now, i though...i can....if i have no chance to trying involved into working world on this time, i hope i can continue my study again....that my last chance, and after finish my study again, i can seriously involved into working world!!!! my world lately full with my fantasy....i can't stop from type a new story and edit the video...
.....i dunno how to stop my addicted in this world....
i can't do anything to myself to...i can't control it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
today is Sunday...and i just sit infront my lappy now, nothing to do....haisssss~~~ i hope i can quickly finish my car lesson and get my lisence!!!!! after that, i hope i can get a job to!!! i think now, i have a lil bit confident to join into working world...even before i still don't have any confident to involved in this world...but now, i though...i can....if i have no chance to trying involved into working world on this time, i hope i can continue my study again....that my last chance, and after finish my study again, i can seriously involved into working world!!!! my world lately full with my fantasy....i can't stop from type a new story and edit the video...
.....i dunno how to stop my addicted in this world.... i can't do anything to myself to...i can't control it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
trouBLe,TrouBle~~~
annyoung.....
everyone, do u feel stuck sometimes with your life?....um, i think i in the middle stuck with my own life now....why i say like that...coz, i already confius about my life now, i dunno which the right path for me now, do i should give up with my course i'm already learn in 3 years or just forget it and start with the course i most like want be....i realy dunno what should i do now, coz sometimes i think, what i'm learning in the course i'm already finish it, some a good thing for my future..but wen i doing my intersting thing in my life, i start to feel down and i really wan doing the thing. does anyone feel something like that to?...argggggg!!!! i dunno to handle this problem, what should i do now!!! what!!!! i wan think positif about that, but sometimes something distrub my positif thinking...oh no...again im fall....TT___TT
everyone, do u feel stuck sometimes with your life?....um, i think i in the middle stuck with my own life now....why i say like that...coz, i already confius about my life now, i dunno which the right path for me now, do i should give up with my course i'm already learn in 3 years or just forget it and start with the course i most like want be....i realy dunno what should i do now, coz sometimes i think, what i'm learning in the course i'm already finish it, some a good thing for my future..but wen i doing my intersting thing in my life, i start to feel down and i really wan doing the thing. does anyone feel something like that to?...argggggg!!!! i dunno to handle this problem, what should i do now!!! what!!!! i wan think positif about that, but sometimes something distrub my positif thinking...oh no...again im fall....TT___TT
Monday, February 28, 2011
HaRd iF EvEryThg chaNge~~~
WaCoo~~~
dO eVryOnE FeeL baD weN sOmEoNe coMe tO u aNd staRt coNfess LoVe feeLinG toWardS u...anD thaN u refuSed to accepT iT?..in AdditiOn, The persOn doiNg thT iS oNe oF yoR besTfrieNd...??????
n sOmetiMes becaUse oF thaT yOr frieNdshiP wiLL be ruiN to riGhT?...foR me noW, if SoMeoNe i sTiLL caLL friEnd n aLwayS bY my siDe aS a FrieNd...i wOuLd accpet thE persOn tO bE mY LoVe oNe day, mAyBe iT wiLL haRd FoR me tO staRt coMmuniCatEd wiTh tHe peRsoN aGaiN..buT soMeoNe whO i didn'T caLL thE persOn as a FrieNd n mayBe juSt a soMeoNe reaLLy noT sO cLose wiTh me,aNd noT aLwys exisT iN mY liST oF friEnd oR wE jUsT mE aT cLass Or aNywHr, buT stiLL soMeoNe i KnoW, maYbe it'S oK fOr mE to accpEt it...anD hOw aBt OtHer persOn OpiNioN????...eVerYoNe sTiLL a HumAn riGht? aNd stiLL caN thiNk whiCh a riGht Or noT...maYbE sOmeOne wiLL juDge tHat iM bE sO harSh tO othEr PersON heaRt righT? buT iF i'm ReaLLy coMfoRtaBLe staY bY u SiDe aS mY friEnd, HoW caN i Do? for Me sOmEoNE caN be mY FrieNd is MoRe vaLuaBle iN mY liFe thaN someOne staY bY siDe juSt fOr LoVe...iN WeN Be a CouPLe i thiNk..maYbe eaCh oF wE wiLL eaSiLy FeeL unTrusteD eVeN ThE pErsOn saY BeLiVed u oR wHteVr..buT tHe fEElinG oF unTrusTed, haTred, jeaLouS, tears anD more wiLL aLwyS disTuRb yoR eMotioNal riGht?...thT mY opiNioN!!!
dO eVryOnE FeeL baD weN sOmEoNe coMe tO u aNd staRt coNfess LoVe feeLinG toWardS u...anD thaN u refuSed to accepT iT?..in AdditiOn, The persOn doiNg thT iS oNe oF yoR besTfrieNd...??????
n sOmetiMes becaUse oF thaT yOr frieNdshiP wiLL be ruiN to riGhT?...foR me noW, if SoMeoNe i sTiLL caLL friEnd n aLwayS bY my siDe aS a FrieNd...i wOuLd accpet thE persOn tO bE mY LoVe oNe day, mAyBe iT wiLL haRd FoR me tO staRt coMmuniCatEd wiTh tHe peRsoN aGaiN..buT soMeoNe whO i didn'T caLL thE persOn as a FrieNd n mayBe juSt a soMeoNe reaLLy noT sO cLose wiTh me,aNd noT aLwys exisT iN mY liST oF friEnd oR wE jUsT mE aT cLass Or aNywHr, buT stiLL soMeoNe i KnoW, maYbe it'S oK fOr mE to accpEt it...anD hOw aBt OtHer persOn OpiNioN????...eVerYoNe sTiLL a HumAn riGht? aNd stiLL caN thiNk whiCh a riGht Or noT...maYbE sOmeOne wiLL juDge tHat iM bE sO harSh tO othEr PersON heaRt righT? buT iF i'm ReaLLy coMfoRtaBLe staY bY u SiDe aS mY friEnd, HoW caN i Do? for Me sOmEoNE caN be mY FrieNd is MoRe vaLuaBle iN mY liFe thaN someOne staY bY siDe juSt fOr LoVe...iN WeN Be a CouPLe i thiNk..maYbe eaCh oF wE wiLL eaSiLy FeeL unTrusteD eVeN ThE pErsOn saY BeLiVed u oR wHteVr..buT tHe fEElinG oF unTrusTed, haTred, jeaLouS, tears anD more wiLL aLwyS disTuRb yoR eMotioNal riGht?...thT mY opiNioN!!!
Saturday, February 26, 2011
aNnyOng!!!
agaiN oNe beTteR daY aLreaDY pasT, buT aGaiN im juSt waste thE day....haisss~~~ riGhT noW i'M juSt repeatLy heaRd thE soNg 'iF u cOmE to mY heaRt'. thiS a FoLk soNg buT aLreadY upGraDe bE a nEw soNg. oh Ya, i reaLLy cuRiouS aBt soMetHinG TodaY...i JusT wonDer iF noW in thiS wOrLd thE CinDeraLLa sToRy oR anOthEr faiRy sTorY stiLL haPPenD iN soMeoNe LiFe????..whY i KeeP wOnDEriNg abouT thiS coZ, sOmetiMes wEN i HeaRd aBoUt aNoThEr PersOnaL StORy...sOMe oF tHeM haVe a siMiLaR sToRy buT iN thE miDDLe aNd aT tHe enD,cOmpLetLy DiFFereNT!!!!
i LoVe ReaD aLL FaiRy TaLe, EVeN i NeeD RepeTLy reaD aLL oF tHem, i StiLL caN reaD iT...bUt whAt a SeriOuS ProBLem i HaVe..is...i usuaLLy FoRgeT soME paRt oF thE sToRY weN i TrY tO reMembEr aBt thE sToRy baCk...aNd thaT'S whY to, i noT eVeN tRy tO drEam tO Be oNe oF tHe characTer. coZ sOmE oF tHe enDinG aNd LiFe stYLe thE chaRactEr haVe aBsoLuteLy contRaRy witH me. firsT aBoUt CinDerELLa LiFe...sHe waS aLwaYs beiNg BuLLeD bY hEr stEp moThEr anD sis....aNd sHe aLso liVe iN pOOr liFe..buT aCCtuaLLy sHe caN defend theiR rigHts!!! anD wHy sHe sHouLd stAy iN eVerYoNe eYe as a WeaK persOn!!! auFfff~~~ hoW i CaN drEaM aBouT tO Be ciNdereLLA?...coZ tHaT hOw i AlWaYs fEEl aNd thiNk eveRytiMes i ReaD hEr sToRY...aNd OtHer oNe...SnoW whiTe sToRY...thiS sToRy soMetimEs tO mE a BiT siLLy,coZ hOw tHe qUeeN geT enVy wiTH aNoThEr pErsoN beauTy?..apaRt frOm thaT, tHe quEEN hV a MagiC poWeR, whY sHe didn'T uSe tHe magiC whiCh caN maKe heR moRe beautiFuL?....waaaaa~~~~ wHy im LiKe tHis tO!!!!
buT tHe StORy maKe mE moRe WoNdEr iS a LittLe mermaiD...coZ tHe LittLe mermaiD faLL iN LoVe wiTh tHe huMan aND aFtEr tHaT thE LittLe MermaiD staRt maKe a RequEsT to becOmE a humaN tO...buT tO bE huMaN LittLe mermaiD sHouLd faCe wiTh a SuffErinG LiFe anD tHe LittLe mermaiD shOuLd sacriFiCe tHe pErsOn sHe LoVe....buT aFtEr a haLf waY anD sHe nearLy bEcOmE a humAn sHe giVe uP anD juSt lEt thE persOn shE LovE gO maRRieD wiTh anoThEr huMan..anD wEn shE can See thE persOn shE loVe haVe a haPPinEss wiTh tHe pErsoN hE noT LoVe..tHe LittLe mermaiD caN stOP froM a SuffErinG aNd painess whiCh shE wiLL disppeaR witH a buBBles to tHe skY anD waitiNg to bE re-born as a huMaN beinG....hoW couLd haVe a sTorY LiKe thiS tO? it'S samE LiKe thE persoN sHe LoVe noT reaLLy loVe her coZ hoW couLd he can ShoW a haPPinEss wiTh soMeoNe hE noT loVe anD he reaLLy haTe befoRe?! aNd tHe LittLe mermaiD reaLLy suRe sHe wiLL re-BorN aS a HumaN?????
i MaY soUnD LiKe i OppOseD tO thE exiStEnce aLL thEse sTories rigHt? buT i didn'T meaN LikE thAT...thAt whaT i aLwayS thinkiNg acctUaLLy everytiMes i ReaD aLL tHe faiRY taLe...buT becaUse i'm liKe tHaT to, i sHouLd reAd repeaTLy aLL tHe stoRy baCk...noW i knOw a ReaSon whY i AlwaYs noT reMembeR soMe oF paRt iN tHe stoRy....thiS beCaUse i usuaLLy loSe foCuS cauSe iM busY wonDerinG thE sToRY aLoT tHaN i FiNisH aNd enjoyiNg tHe sToRy...wahahahahhahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!
Friday, February 25, 2011
mY haRd daY!!!
annYoNg!!!![]()
day by day aLreaDy pAst...buT i'M stiLL HeRe n DoiNg a saMe thiNg in my LifE...bE LoNeLy in OnE siDe...ReaLLY haRd foR me..coZ i'M noT a TyPe whO caN siT quiETLy iN oNe PLaCe aT LeasT LeT mE doiNg sOmEtHinG LiKE a DRaWiNg....seKaraNg sY terFiKir anD terTanYa whT eVerYoNE do? buT i'M suDdeNLy aNsWeriNg by myseLf...myB aDa anTarA Mereka yG sEdanG GemBirA Or BerSediH oN thiS tiMe riGhT?
haiss...kenApALaH sY raSaKan SekranG ni seMakiNg SukaR toK sY LaLu...i'M reaLLy waN goiNg sTudY agaiN!!! coZ EvErthiNg aFtEr WE doNe fRoM sTuDy...iT juST aLL abOuT MoNeY...eVerY waY,eVerYday MonEy! MoNeY! MoNey!!!....i dUnno wHaT kiNd a JoB sTuiaBLe fOR mE tO...buT iN tHe BoTToM oF mY hEarT..i'M reaLLy EnJoYing wEn i CaN EdiT sOmeThiNg..LiKe maKinG a ViDeo anD ediTiNg sOme piC!!! reaLLy AweSoMe!!! n LaTely i'M foUnD nEw attraction doiNg suBtiTLe fOR a SoME viDeO!!!!....buT i DuNNo hoW i caN reaLLy iNvoLvEd iN thiS fiELD..iF i caN coNtiNue mY sTudy aGaiN i HoPe i caN sTuDy aBoUt thiS fiELd..i WaN KnOw aLoT abOuT tHiS fiELd..coZ wEn i DoiNg EdiTiNg ViDeo oR doiNg maKe a SubTiTLe foR a soMe ViDeo i sEE a GLow..thAt ThE haPPiNess GLow anD maKe mE knOw mY liFe goaLs...apaRt frOm thaT..iM aLsO EnJoyiNG iN wRiTinG soMe sToRy..i haVe aLoT stOrY i'M doNe WriTiNg...buT i UsuaLLy LoSe tHe waY wHere i caN shaRe tHe sToRy coZ i'M reaLLy wOrrY iF soMeoNe ThinK tHe sToRy BoRed oR soMethiNg a uSelEss stOry oR maYbe doN'T hv aNyoN eto Read iT...im ReaLLy laCk a Confident to....
i kNoW i duN hV aLoT PerSoN suPPorT Me iN whaT im Interested doiNg noW..oR maYbE soMe oF thEM noT eVeN kNoW it. soMetiMes i FeeL LiKe whaT iM iNterested in juSt iM DreaMinG aboUt...i neaRlY giVe uP wEn i thiNk abOuT otHer pErsOn cRiticize abOuT iM inTerested abOut noW...buT wEn i oPeN mY LaPPy i thiNk i ReaLLy can't easiLy giVe up iN thiS fieLd to...wAaaaa!!!! tHat'S whY, i FeeL mY LiFe it's GoiNg hard!!!! every tiMes i oPeN mY LaPPy it saMe LiKe a sonG NaTaNa( aPpear oSt oF SeCreT gaRden) coMe iN mY miNd..sO hoW i caN leT oFf oF EveryThiNg!!!!!! oN thiS mOMenT i DuNNO wiTh whO i waN taLk anD gV Me a advice abOuT whaT i ShoULd do noW....aND i KnoW, iF soMeoNe doinG soMethiNg wiThoUt a bLeesiNg fRoM presEnT, it wiLL noT suCceeds!!!
hOw To maKe mY LiFe noT haRd aNYmoRe!!!!
day by day aLreaDy pAst...buT i'M stiLL HeRe n DoiNg a saMe thiNg in my LifE...bE LoNeLy in OnE siDe...ReaLLY haRd foR me..coZ i'M noT a TyPe whO caN siT quiETLy iN oNe PLaCe aT LeasT LeT mE doiNg sOmEtHinG LiKE a DRaWiNg....seKaraNg sY terFiKir anD terTanYa whT eVerYoNE do? buT i'M suDdeNLy aNsWeriNg by myseLf...myB aDa anTarA Mereka yG sEdanG GemBirA Or BerSediH oN thiS tiMe riGhT?
haiss...kenApALaH sY raSaKan SekranG ni seMakiNg SukaR toK sY LaLu...i'M reaLLy waN goiNg sTudY agaiN!!! coZ EvErthiNg aFtEr WE doNe fRoM sTuDy...iT juST aLL abOuT MoNeY...eVerY waY,eVerYday MonEy! MoNeY! MoNey!!!....i dUnno wHaT kiNd a JoB sTuiaBLe fOR mE tO...buT iN tHe BoTToM oF mY hEarT..i'M reaLLy EnJoYing wEn i CaN EdiT sOmeThiNg..LiKe maKinG a ViDeo anD ediTiNg sOme piC!!! reaLLy AweSoMe!!! n LaTely i'M foUnD nEw attraction doiNg suBtiTLe fOR a SoME viDeO!!!!....buT i DuNNo hoW i caN reaLLy iNvoLvEd iN thiS fiELD..iF i caN coNtiNue mY sTudy aGaiN i HoPe i caN sTuDy aBoUt thiS fiELd..i WaN KnOw aLoT abOuT tHiS fiELd..coZ wEn i DoiNg EdiTiNg ViDeo oR doiNg maKe a SubTiTLe foR a soMe ViDeo i sEE a GLow..thAt ThE haPPiNess GLow anD maKe mE knOw mY liFe goaLs...apaRt frOm thaT..iM aLsO EnJoyiNG iN wRiTinG soMe sToRy..i haVe aLoT stOrY i'M doNe WriTiNg...buT i UsuaLLy LoSe tHe waY wHere i caN shaRe tHe sToRy coZ i'M reaLLy wOrrY iF soMeoNe ThinK tHe sToRy BoRed oR soMethiNg a uSelEss stOry oR maYbe doN'T hv aNyoN eto Read iT...im ReaLLy laCk a Confident to....
i kNoW i duN hV aLoT PerSoN suPPorT Me iN whaT im Interested doiNg noW..oR maYbE soMe oF thEM noT eVeN kNoW it. soMetiMes i FeeL LiKe whaT iM iNterested in juSt iM DreaMinG aboUt...i neaRlY giVe uP wEn i thiNk abOuT otHer pErsOn cRiticize abOuT iM inTerested abOut noW...buT wEn i oPeN mY LaPPy i thiNk i ReaLLy can't easiLy giVe up iN thiS fieLd to...wAaaaa!!!! tHat'S whY, i FeeL mY LiFe it's GoiNg hard!!!! every tiMes i oPeN mY LaPPy it saMe LiKe a sonG NaTaNa( aPpear oSt oF SeCreT gaRden) coMe iN mY miNd..sO hoW i caN leT oFf oF EveryThiNg!!!!!! oN thiS mOMenT i DuNNO wiTh whO i waN taLk anD gV Me a advice abOuT whaT i ShoULd do noW....aND i KnoW, iF soMeoNe doinG soMethiNg wiThoUt a bLeesiNg fRoM presEnT, it wiLL noT suCceeds!!!
hOw To maKe mY LiFe noT haRd aNYmoRe!!!!
Saturday, February 19, 2011
sToRy i DiDn'T kNoW.....
aku pasti yg aku bergitu menyukai dan menyintainya sejak kali pertama aku melihatnya, ketika semua org menganggap aku spt bhn ketawa mrk, hny dia menghampiri aku dan menghulurkan tangan utk membantu aku, ini bkn kali pertama dia melakukan hal itu, ttp berkali-kali. disaat dia memberitahu aku yg dia suka bersama aku dan ketika dia menyatakan jika dia ingin menyanyi hny dgn aku dia akn lakukan hal itu. kata-kata itu bergitu tlh memgubah kehidupan aku dr sorg gds yg lemah dan mudah dibuli kpd yg lebih yakin akn diri sendiri...semua ini adlh krn die,ttp disaat aku bertemunya dan meluahkan perasaan aku sbnrnya pdnya bkn shj kwn ttp lebih dr itu,dia mula menjauhi aku dan sukar bg aku utk bertemu dgnnya,aku tdk pasti knp, dan mengapa dia bertindak sdmkian....dia tdk menjawab ya atau tdk jua bg jwpn aku ini...ttp aku masih menunggu di tempat yg sm aku melihatnya dgn hrpn dia akn berikan jwpn yg jelas....
shg pd satu hr, disbkan aku sering kali menunggu kehadirannya aku tlh jatuh sakit, dan apbl aku membuka mata, semua rakan aku ada disitu melawat aku, tp aku masih tdk melihat kelibatnya. airmata aku hampir menitis stp kali bayangan wajahnya muncul didlm stp mimpi aku. aku hampir hilang kawalan diri stp kali aku merinduinya. dan pd satu malam, ketika aku duduk ditepi tingkap dan menitiskan airmata,dia muncul dgn memegang bahu aku, aku hampir memeluknya ketika itu, aku bergitu merindui kehadiran ini. tp dia lngs tdk menoleh kpd aku, tdk berkata apa-apa selain drp dia menyatakan dia dtg bertemu aku krn dia rs bosan dan tiada apa yg dia nak buat selepas krj,kata-katanya mungkin terlalu kejam, ttp aku hny melemparkan senyuman pdnya dgn menyatakan kehadirannya kesini sdh ckp bg aku. aku jg meminta agr dia melupakan shj kata-kata aku kpdnya sblm ini, jwpn yg aku inginkan jg, aku tdk ingin lg dengar diketika itu. aku cuba kembali bemesra dgnnya ttp dia lngs tdk spt apa yg aku hrpkan itu. aku sememangnya keliru dan buntu knp keadaan ini berlaku dlm hubungan kami. sblm dia meninggalkan aku sekali lagi, dia meminta aku tdk meluahkan prsaan aku kpdnya lg dan dia jg tdk mahu aku menyalah anggap akn kebaikannya terhadap aku sblm ini, krn dia menyatakan apa yg dia lakukan kpd aku hnylah prsaan kesian dia terhadap aku, dan tdk prnh lebih dr itu. aku cb menahan airmata aku ketika kata-kata itu dilemparkan kpd aku dr mulutnya. sebaik dia berkata demikian,dia sgr melangkah prg, ttp aku hny menyatakan selamat tinggal kpdnya shj ketika itu bersama snyman. sebaik dia meninggalkan aku disitu, aku mula menangis dgn sesungguhnya spt sudah tiada esok lg bg aku ketika itu. kesakitan aku semakin bertambah-tambah..bagaikan sebijik peluru sdg menembusi diri aku ketika itu.
dlm keadaan sedemikian, aku sgr berlari keluar dr bilik tersenut dan cb mendapatkannya kembali krn aku masih tdk jelas dgn sgl cerita yg telah diciptanya atr aku sblm ini.aku berlari keluar tnp arah tuju sehingga disatu sudut, aku mengalah dan hny mampu terduduk dan menangis. dlm aku keadaan sedemikian,dia kembali dtg pd aku dan memeluk aku dr arah belakang, dia turut membisikkan kpd aku, bhw aku hrs berhenti dr bersikap demikian, dia jg meminta aku tdk menyintai dia sedemikian, sblm dia prg tnp membenarkan aku melihat pdnya, dia mencium dahi aku, dan dia prg utk selamanya.....wlpn aku menangis airmata darah sekalipun ketika itu, dia tdk akn kembali lg kpd aku.....
setelah bbrp tahun berlalu, aku masih tdk prh dpt melupakannya...kisah yg aku tdk tahu akn dirinya adlh, dia akn meninggalkan aku dan dunia ini slm-lamanya...sb itu...apa yg berlaku atr aku dgn dia, adlah pkr yg aku jg tdk ingin mengetahuinya lg....
-THE END-
Thursday, February 17, 2011
mY fiRtS LoVe wiLL diSpPeaR...
kehidupan aku hanya dipenuhi dgn keseronokan,stp malam aku akn keluar ke kelab malam wlpn aku masih di bawah umur utk ke tempat tersebut, tp disebabkan oleh pekerja disitu kwn aku, jd aku dpt masuk ke tempat tersebut dgn mudah.
pada suatu malam,semasa aku cuba mencari seseorang yang mampu mengembirakan aku pd malam tersebut, aku terlihat sorg gadis yg mempunyai wajah sedih disebalik senyumannya semasa berada di kelab malam tersebut. aku menghampirinya, aku duduk dibangku disebelahnya dan merenung kpdnya sambil aku tersenyum. dia hny membalas dgn jelingan dan menoleh ke arah lain ketika aku membuat sedemikian. tetapi tdk lama kemudian, dia kelihatan spt terkejut dan cuba menyembunyikan dirinya dr seseorg. dia sgr bangun dr bangkunya dan menyembunyi di belakang aku dia turut meminta aku agr melindunginya ketika itu. melihat gelagatnya aku tersenyum sendirian,dan dia masih berlindung dibelakang aku sehingga kami ke tempat yg sukar dilihat oleh org ramai. sebaik kami disitu dia mula sedar yg dia telah menggunakan aku dan dia kelihatan segan semasa cuba melihat pd aku, tetapi aku hny tersenyum kpd segala tindakannya itu. bermula saat itulah, aku mula mengenali dirinya.
pada suatu ptg semasa dia berada didlm sebuah kereta bersama bodyguardnya, aku yg sdg membawa motor lalu disebelahnya dan memberi isyarat kpdnya yg aku ingin bertemu dgnnya stlh lama kami tdk dpt bertemu. dan dia berjaya mengelirukan bodyguardnya dgn berpura ke tandas dan mengikut aku.hny melalui cr tersebut yg mampu menemukan aku dgn dia, ini krn dia sering dikawal ketat oleh bodyguard ahli keluarganya.
aku seronok dpt keluar dan menemaninya berjalan, melihat dia tersenyum dan sentiasa cb mengenali kehidupan aku, membuatkan aku kembali mengenali kebahagian stlh lama aku kehilangan perasaan tersebut. aku turut membawanya ke tempat dimana manjadi tempat tinggal aku. dia tdk henti-henti memuji dan melihat di sekeliling kawasan tersebut. dia turut ingin mencuba permainan yg aku main disitu juga. semasa aku bersamanya ditempat tersebut, aku sedar akn rakan perempuan sekolah aku telah melihat aku bersamanya disitu, wajah rakan aku kelihatan sedih, tetapi aku hny memberikan isyarat melalui mata aku,agr dia tdk menganggu dan beredar dr situ.
apabila aku merasakan hubungan aku dgnnya semakin mula serius,bodyguardnya telah berjaya menemui identiti aku disekolah aku. tanpa menyoalkan aku apa-apa dia hanya menarik aku keluar dr kelas aku, ketika aku cb memberhentikannya, dia memandang aku dgn pandangan yg tajam dan spt ingin aku berurusan dgnnya. aku menerima tawaran itu dan kami mula berbincang di tempat aku, dia meletakkan syarat kpd aku, jika aku mampu mengalahkannya, dia akn membiarkan aku berkawan dgn ank buah jagaannya itu, tetapi jika aku gagal aku harus memberhentikan dr bertemu dgnnya lg. aku menerima tawaran itu, tetapi akhirnya aku telah tewas olehnya, dan spt janji aku, aku harus berhenti dr bertemu dgnnya lg. aku sgt kecewa akn hal itu shg aku melepaskan marah dgn menumbuk-numbuk ke dinding. ketika rakan kelas aku menghampiri aku untuk membaluti luka ditangan aku,aku hny mampu melepaskan marah pdnya, krn aku menyangkakan dia yg telah menyatakan pertemuan aku kpd bodyguard dia krn dia prh melihat aku bersamanya. aku mehempas kerusi dihadapan rakan aku, dan ketika itu dia hny berdiri melihat aku sambil menangis spt meminta aku memberhentikan tuduhan aku kpdnya.
setelah sekian lama aku tdk bertemunya, semasa aku dtg ke tempat yg menjadi tempat tinggal aku dan kawan aku, aku melihat dia berada disitu, dan ketika aku mempersoalkan knp dia dtg kesini, dia hny menyatakan yg dia ingin bertemu aku.aku cb menahan diri aku dr menjadi lembut terhadapnya, lantas aku menghampirinya dan menarik tangannya utk meminta dia prg dr situ, tetapi dia bekeras utk tdk mahu prg dan dia turut membuat permintaan kpd aku yg dia ingin aku membawanya dgn motorsikal aku. aku menunaikan permintaannya itu. semasa kami di ats motorsikal, dia memeluk aku dgn erat spt tdk ingin melepaskan aku stlh aku bersikap kasar dan dingin pdnya sbg janji aku kpd bodyguardnya. ketika apa yg dilakukannya itu, aku bergitu sekali ingin membiarkan keadaan itu trs berkekalan, tp aku pasti, aku tdk akn dpt melindunginya dgn sebaiknya jika dia bersama aku.jd secara senyap-senyap, aku telah menghubungi bodyguardnya utk meminta mengambil semula dia.sebaik aku membuat panggilan dan kembali ke motorsikal aku, aku melihat dia sudah tiada. aku hny mampu mengeluh dan merasakan pertemuan itu tadi, adalah pertemu kami yg terakhir.
sejak dr hari itu juga, aku tdk lagi bertemu dan mendengar berita akn dirinya lagi, aku tdk pasti kemana dia berada atau apa yg sedang dia lakukan ketika ini. wlpn aku kembali ke tempat kali pertama aku bertemunya,aku masih tdk dpt bertemunya. saat itu aku pasti dia mungkin telah menemui jalan hidup dia yg sebenar.sesekali airmt aku yg menitis stp kali aku menunggang motorsikal aku sendiri, aku pasti akn mengingati cinta pertama aku yg penuh ketewasan utk aku miliki selamanya ini...
-THE END-
pada suatu malam,semasa aku cuba mencari seseorang yang mampu mengembirakan aku pd malam tersebut, aku terlihat sorg gadis yg mempunyai wajah sedih disebalik senyumannya semasa berada di kelab malam tersebut. aku menghampirinya, aku duduk dibangku disebelahnya dan merenung kpdnya sambil aku tersenyum. dia hny membalas dgn jelingan dan menoleh ke arah lain ketika aku membuat sedemikian. tetapi tdk lama kemudian, dia kelihatan spt terkejut dan cuba menyembunyikan dirinya dr seseorg. dia sgr bangun dr bangkunya dan menyembunyi di belakang aku dia turut meminta aku agr melindunginya ketika itu. melihat gelagatnya aku tersenyum sendirian,dan dia masih berlindung dibelakang aku sehingga kami ke tempat yg sukar dilihat oleh org ramai. sebaik kami disitu dia mula sedar yg dia telah menggunakan aku dan dia kelihatan segan semasa cuba melihat pd aku, tetapi aku hny tersenyum kpd segala tindakannya itu. bermula saat itulah, aku mula mengenali dirinya.
pada suatu ptg semasa dia berada didlm sebuah kereta bersama bodyguardnya, aku yg sdg membawa motor lalu disebelahnya dan memberi isyarat kpdnya yg aku ingin bertemu dgnnya stlh lama kami tdk dpt bertemu. dan dia berjaya mengelirukan bodyguardnya dgn berpura ke tandas dan mengikut aku.hny melalui cr tersebut yg mampu menemukan aku dgn dia, ini krn dia sering dikawal ketat oleh bodyguard ahli keluarganya.
aku seronok dpt keluar dan menemaninya berjalan, melihat dia tersenyum dan sentiasa cb mengenali kehidupan aku, membuatkan aku kembali mengenali kebahagian stlh lama aku kehilangan perasaan tersebut. aku turut membawanya ke tempat dimana manjadi tempat tinggal aku. dia tdk henti-henti memuji dan melihat di sekeliling kawasan tersebut. dia turut ingin mencuba permainan yg aku main disitu juga. semasa aku bersamanya ditempat tersebut, aku sedar akn rakan perempuan sekolah aku telah melihat aku bersamanya disitu, wajah rakan aku kelihatan sedih, tetapi aku hny memberikan isyarat melalui mata aku,agr dia tdk menganggu dan beredar dr situ.
apabila aku merasakan hubungan aku dgnnya semakin mula serius,bodyguardnya telah berjaya menemui identiti aku disekolah aku. tanpa menyoalkan aku apa-apa dia hanya menarik aku keluar dr kelas aku, ketika aku cb memberhentikannya, dia memandang aku dgn pandangan yg tajam dan spt ingin aku berurusan dgnnya. aku menerima tawaran itu dan kami mula berbincang di tempat aku, dia meletakkan syarat kpd aku, jika aku mampu mengalahkannya, dia akn membiarkan aku berkawan dgn ank buah jagaannya itu, tetapi jika aku gagal aku harus memberhentikan dr bertemu dgnnya lg. aku menerima tawaran itu, tetapi akhirnya aku telah tewas olehnya, dan spt janji aku, aku harus berhenti dr bertemu dgnnya lg. aku sgt kecewa akn hal itu shg aku melepaskan marah dgn menumbuk-numbuk ke dinding. ketika rakan kelas aku menghampiri aku untuk membaluti luka ditangan aku,aku hny mampu melepaskan marah pdnya, krn aku menyangkakan dia yg telah menyatakan pertemuan aku kpd bodyguard dia krn dia prh melihat aku bersamanya. aku mehempas kerusi dihadapan rakan aku, dan ketika itu dia hny berdiri melihat aku sambil menangis spt meminta aku memberhentikan tuduhan aku kpdnya.
setelah sekian lama aku tdk bertemunya, semasa aku dtg ke tempat yg menjadi tempat tinggal aku dan kawan aku, aku melihat dia berada disitu, dan ketika aku mempersoalkan knp dia dtg kesini, dia hny menyatakan yg dia ingin bertemu aku.aku cb menahan diri aku dr menjadi lembut terhadapnya, lantas aku menghampirinya dan menarik tangannya utk meminta dia prg dr situ, tetapi dia bekeras utk tdk mahu prg dan dia turut membuat permintaan kpd aku yg dia ingin aku membawanya dgn motorsikal aku. aku menunaikan permintaannya itu. semasa kami di ats motorsikal, dia memeluk aku dgn erat spt tdk ingin melepaskan aku stlh aku bersikap kasar dan dingin pdnya sbg janji aku kpd bodyguardnya. ketika apa yg dilakukannya itu, aku bergitu sekali ingin membiarkan keadaan itu trs berkekalan, tp aku pasti, aku tdk akn dpt melindunginya dgn sebaiknya jika dia bersama aku.jd secara senyap-senyap, aku telah menghubungi bodyguardnya utk meminta mengambil semula dia.sebaik aku membuat panggilan dan kembali ke motorsikal aku, aku melihat dia sudah tiada. aku hny mampu mengeluh dan merasakan pertemuan itu tadi, adalah pertemu kami yg terakhir.
sejak dr hari itu juga, aku tdk lagi bertemu dan mendengar berita akn dirinya lagi, aku tdk pasti kemana dia berada atau apa yg sedang dia lakukan ketika ini. wlpn aku kembali ke tempat kali pertama aku bertemunya,aku masih tdk dpt bertemunya. saat itu aku pasti dia mungkin telah menemui jalan hidup dia yg sebenar.sesekali airmt aku yg menitis stp kali aku menunggang motorsikal aku sendiri, aku pasti akn mengingati cinta pertama aku yg penuh ketewasan utk aku miliki selamanya ini...
-THE END-
Saturday, February 12, 2011
tO: mY aSSistant
annYonG~~
TodaY mYb a TiriNg daY i Hv...eVn hoW, ToDaY aLrdY pasT...buT im ReaLizEd soMetHg wRoNg tOwaRds mY fEeLinG whIcH i ALwyS FeeL emPtY bEfOre..ThS FeeLinG...i thiNks..tHs feeLinG coMe tO me aFtR i FiniSh mY stuDY...i WonDer whY aLoT...wHicH paRt mK iT worse LiKe thS??? i woNder...buT toDay in The tiRinG daY i HV..wHeN i c TWO friEnd mEEt aGn toDay..tHey huG tiGhTLy inTo eaCh oTher..aNd tHeY staRt tO shAre tHey'r oWn Life...whT thy do?whC thR leaVe noW..n MorE..waTchiNg thE sCene..i SuddEnLy asKinG mySeLf.. 'i Hv a FriEnd wHc i caN't saY thE reaL woRd tOwarDs tHe persOn'..n i sigh... and wHeN i bacK tO mY hOmE AFtR a tirinG daY..when i laY oN my bEd,i QuiCkLy faLL aSleEp
N aFtR tHt i SerIouSLy FaLL iN deeP dreAmLanD..
iN my DreaM..i MeeT aLL mY FriEnd buT i can't see u..EvRyOnE tHr..wE enJoY ToGetHer..pLay, cHat n ShaRe EvRyThg..n ThE teaRs tO...buT seCretLy iN tHe paRty..i duNNo wHy i cRy seCretLy iN tHe daRk aLLeY..iT saMe LiKe a CrZY ThG i DoiNg iN mY LiFe..CoZ I cRy buT i can'T saY anYtHg n weN eVryOnE aSK me wHy im cRy..i can'T TeLL a GooD exCuSe to.....
mY LiFe ReaLLy haRd withoUt the PerSoN aCtLy, eVn i eaSiLY diSLiKe sOMe of tHe pErSoN BehaVioR...tHe pErsOn...jSt stAy bY my siDe as tHe persOn caN...yuP,i can't denied whicH mY behaViOr i gv tHe persOn n wHt tHe persOn saW...iT's ThE reaL mE...siNce i meeT tHe persOn..I aLrdY mK a ProMise tO mk u stay bY mY siDe to as my FrieNd...buT i nvR tOLd u tHt riTe?..i can't i dOn'T knW hOw tO starT iT...but wItHouT saY anYtHg u saMe CLeaR aBt me..u aLwyS remind me whT i forgeT..coZ iM a kinD a PersOn aLwyS fOrGet SomEthG iMportAnT aNd duNNo hV tO aRRangEd EvrythG RiTe..u maKe iT tO me...u A PersOn WhO sUppOrT mE aLot..wHen i caMe as a strange person in aNotHer person Eye..mY iNteresTiNg,my waY n ThE waY i thInk qbsOluTelY diFfereNt LiKe aNoTher pErsoN,im saMe LiKe hV a oWN PLaNeT riTe? bUt hOw U caN ThrOugh mY PLaNet? U LiKe a mY taiLs sOmEtiMe..coZ wHr i bE tHr u AlWyS ThR tO..AnD mYb iN oThR persOn eYe thiNk tHt im LiKE buLLy u..bUt i DuNNo hOw thS aLL HaPPend...
iM reaLLy a baD pErsoN u KnW accTLy..i caN't hanDLe mY eMotioN tO u wEN sOmeThg HaPpend BtW us..i NvR asK u wHt u doiNg tHT oR it's tht TrUe?....i JsT staRt ThE FiGhT wiThoUt thiNk aBt aNotHr effEct..yUp,aGn i denied iT, u a tiReD PersOn i waN ProTect...i DuNnO hOw muCH TeaRs CaMe oUt eVryTms wE iN tRoUbLe..n i HaTe ThE caLm faCe u sHoW evrytMs wE figHt tO...U tHe oNe pErsOn whC i aLwyS nEEd starT tO taLk agN afTr wE figHt...sOmEtMs i boRed iN thS siTuatIoN..iT'S samE LiKe jsT iM tHe One wHO maKe a EffoRt tO baCK tO u...becoZ of ThT to iM staRt tO hOlD aLL mY tEarS weN soMetHg baD haPPenD agN bTw Us N mY LiFe...
iM sO soRrY coz i ReaLLy duNNo tO saY a woRd tO u n aLL mY frienD BY mY sIde...i jSt caN sHoW hoW muCh i caRe abT U wiTh hurtiNg u n MK sOmE eFfort tO u hate Me...eVeN noW i can't saY aNytHg...i HoPe iF u read thS dOn'T qUestioN aBt friEnD WE hV...n i HoPe u caN kEEP tHe memOrY i gV u As yoR fRieNd iN thS firsT PlaCe...buT pLs don't saY aNytHg abT thS iN fronT Of ME..I KnoW wVryThg...buT i can'T saY it..N i knW u caN UnderstAnD iT cLearLy tO rIte?.....oh ya, OUR liFe reaLLy GoiNg harD daY bY daY now...eSPcLy tO Me...iF u miNd? dO u waN bE mY assistant agN *hahahaha* (tHt wHt i aLwYs caLL u rite)
frOm: tHe PersOn withoUt word..
TodaY mYb a TiriNg daY i Hv...eVn hoW, ToDaY aLrdY pasT...buT im ReaLizEd soMetHg wRoNg tOwaRds mY fEeLinG whIcH i ALwyS FeeL emPtY bEfOre..ThS FeeLinG...i thiNks..tHs feeLinG coMe tO me aFtR i FiniSh mY stuDY...i WonDer whY aLoT...wHicH paRt mK iT worse LiKe thS??? i woNder...buT toDay in The tiRinG daY i HV..wHeN i c TWO friEnd mEEt aGn toDay..tHey huG tiGhTLy inTo eaCh oTher..aNd tHeY staRt tO shAre tHey'r oWn Life...whT thy do?whC thR leaVe noW..n MorE..waTchiNg thE sCene..i SuddEnLy asKinG mySeLf.. 'i Hv a FriEnd wHc i caN't saY thE reaL woRd tOwarDs tHe persOn'..n i sigh... and wHeN i bacK tO mY hOmE AFtR a tirinG daY..when i laY oN my bEd,i QuiCkLy faLL aSleEp
N aFtR tHt i SerIouSLy FaLL iN deeP dreAmLanD..iN my DreaM..i MeeT aLL mY FriEnd buT i can't see u..EvRyOnE tHr..wE enJoY ToGetHer..pLay, cHat n ShaRe EvRyThg..n ThE teaRs tO...buT seCretLy iN tHe paRty..i duNNo wHy i cRy seCretLy iN tHe daRk aLLeY..iT saMe LiKe a CrZY ThG i DoiNg iN mY LiFe..CoZ I cRy buT i can'T saY anYtHg n weN eVryOnE aSK me wHy im cRy..i can'T TeLL a GooD exCuSe to.....
mY LiFe ReaLLy haRd withoUt the PerSoN aCtLy, eVn i eaSiLY diSLiKe sOMe of tHe pErSoN BehaVioR...tHe pErsOn...jSt stAy bY my siDe as tHe persOn caN...yuP,i can't denied whicH mY behaViOr i gv tHe persOn n wHt tHe persOn saW...iT's ThE reaL mE...siNce i meeT tHe persOn..I aLrdY mK a ProMise tO mk u stay bY mY siDe to as my FrieNd...buT i nvR tOLd u tHt riTe?..i can't i dOn'T knW hOw tO starT iT...but wItHouT saY anYtHg u saMe CLeaR aBt me..u aLwyS remind me whT i forgeT..coZ iM a kinD a PersOn aLwyS fOrGet SomEthG iMportAnT aNd duNNo hV tO aRRangEd EvrythG RiTe..u maKe iT tO me...u A PersOn WhO sUppOrT mE aLot..wHen i caMe as a strange person in aNotHer person Eye..mY iNteresTiNg,my waY n ThE waY i thInk qbsOluTelY diFfereNt LiKe aNoTher pErsoN,im saMe LiKe hV a oWN PLaNeT riTe? bUt hOw U caN ThrOugh mY PLaNet? U LiKe a mY taiLs sOmEtiMe..coZ wHr i bE tHr u AlWyS ThR tO..AnD mYb iN oThR persOn eYe thiNk tHt im LiKE buLLy u..bUt i DuNNo hOw thS aLL HaPPend...
iM reaLLy a baD pErsoN u KnW accTLy..i caN't hanDLe mY eMotioN tO u wEN sOmeThg HaPpend BtW us..i NvR asK u wHt u doiNg tHT oR it's tht TrUe?....i JsT staRt ThE FiGhT wiThoUt thiNk aBt aNotHr effEct..yUp,aGn i denied iT, u a tiReD PersOn i waN ProTect...i DuNnO hOw muCH TeaRs CaMe oUt eVryTms wE iN tRoUbLe..n i HaTe ThE caLm faCe u sHoW evrytMs wE figHt tO...U tHe oNe pErsOn whC i aLwyS nEEd starT tO taLk agN afTr wE figHt...sOmEtMs i boRed iN thS siTuatIoN..iT'S samE LiKe jsT iM tHe One wHO maKe a EffoRt tO baCK tO u...becoZ of ThT to iM staRt tO hOlD aLL mY tEarS weN soMetHg baD haPPenD agN bTw Us N mY LiFe...
iM sO soRrY coz i ReaLLy duNNo tO saY a woRd tO u n aLL mY frienD BY mY sIde...i jSt caN sHoW hoW muCh i caRe abT U wiTh hurtiNg u n MK sOmE eFfort tO u hate Me...eVeN noW i can't saY aNytHg...i HoPe iF u read thS dOn'T qUestioN aBt friEnD WE hV...n i HoPe u caN kEEP tHe memOrY i gV u As yoR fRieNd iN thS firsT PlaCe...buT pLs don't saY aNytHg abT thS iN fronT Of ME..I KnoW wVryThg...buT i can'T saY it..N i knW u caN UnderstAnD iT cLearLy tO rIte?.....oh ya, OUR liFe reaLLy GoiNg harD daY bY daY now...eSPcLy tO Me...iF u miNd? dO u waN bE mY assistant agN *hahahaha* (tHt wHt i aLwYs caLL u rite)
frOm: tHe PersOn withoUt word..
Tuesday, February 8, 2011
aNnYouNg~~~~
wOw...i miSsssssss mA BLoG aLot...sO LoNg tiMe i Didn'T poSt anYtHg nEw Here..coZ i DiDn'T kNow wHt i ShLd wriTe aBt...sO i'm BaCK noW agN
nOw aLrdY FeBrUaRy 2011..buT i ThoUgh tHt iM sTiLL duNNo whT i ShLd do iN ma LiFe...i LoVe doiNg sOMe ediTiNg iN VideO Or MaKiNg sOMe ViDeo...n i hoPe oNe daY i Can InVoLvEd iN EnTeRtaiMenT wOrLd wHc i can ProDuCed a sTOrY aNd OtHer...buT i KnOw...theRe aRe MaNY wHo DO noT KnOw AbT mY iNterEst in ThS...wHt caN i Do..
buT dePlY iN mA hEarT i sTiLL eaSiLY GiVe-uP iN wHt i Interest...i HoPe the daY WiLL CoMe to Me aNd i WiLL hOLd iT tigHtLy!!!!! ya!! FigHtiNggggg!!!!!
haisss~~~ i ReaLLy duNNo whT i SHLD wRiTe aBt noW...huMMmm...
so BeTter i StOp HeRe riTe...haiss..oK da~~~
wOw...i miSsssssss mA BLoG aLot...sO LoNg tiMe i Didn'T poSt anYtHg nEw Here..coZ i DiDn'T kNow wHt i ShLd wriTe aBt...sO i'm BaCK noW agN
nOw aLrdY FeBrUaRy 2011..buT i ThoUgh tHt iM sTiLL duNNo whT i ShLd do iN ma LiFe...i LoVe doiNg sOMe ediTiNg iN VideO Or MaKiNg sOMe ViDeo...n i hoPe oNe daY i Can InVoLvEd iN EnTeRtaiMenT wOrLd wHc i can ProDuCed a sTOrY aNd OtHer...buT i KnOw...theRe aRe MaNY wHo DO noT KnOw AbT mY iNterEst in ThS...wHt caN i Do..buT dePlY iN mA hEarT i sTiLL eaSiLY GiVe-uP iN wHt i Interest...i HoPe the daY WiLL CoMe to Me aNd i WiLL hOLd iT tigHtLy!!!!! ya!! FigHtiNggggg!!!!!
haisss~~~ i ReaLLy duNNo whT i SHLD wRiTe aBt noW...huMMmm...
so BeTter i StOp HeRe riTe...haiss..oK da~~~
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